Funky McFunkerson

So I'm in a funk. It's a weird in and out funk, where it comes and goes. But lately it's become more pronounced. When i'm feeling funk-ish I get that itchy sweater feeling, where almost everything is slightly irksome. And I also feel like things are tasteless, or at least taste less good. And i'm not really talking about food as much as life. It's not that I'm unhappy, but it's like colors are a little less vivid, experiences a little less sweet. I dunno, it's hard to describe. Maybe it's all of the changes that have occurred in the past 3 months - and the upcoming ones that I'm dreading.

I still miss Anastasia. I can't quite get over it to get a new hamster. Although I really want a winter white - they were so cute in the pet store! But I had to take Chai to the vet the other day and was sitting in the room realizing that I hadn't been since A's last visit for her surgery. And then on Sat. I finally got around to burying her at my parents house. I felt oddly detached and sad all at the same time.

On the up side, I have been GREATLY enjoying re-reading all the Harry Potter books in succession, particularly the 5th one. I always knew it was my favorite, but it had been so long since I'd read it, I just loved it. It's beyond words really. I just finished the 6th 2 days ago and spent the majority of the book realizing how disappointed I was at the movie. I just started the last one yesterday, but I'm not looking forward to all the sadness. Anyway, I'm pretty impressed at my record of reading the 6 in less than 2 weeks. :)

I also had the fun time of watching home movies on Sat with the fam, Justin and Donnie. It started with the main purpose of embarassing my sister in front of Justin. But the 6 of us were packed on the couches practically peeing our pants at some of the fun stuff. Laur was 3 and I was 5. And let me tell you - I was an attention hog and non-stop chatty. And very anal. :)

Ok, that's enough rambling. I don't have much of interest to say, just that I'm bored at work because I got a new computer on Thursday and they have yet to install SAS on it. So i'm useless.

i got my tamales :)

So, I went on a first date tonight, and it was not nearly as painful as many first dates can be. It actually ranks as one of the best. He even paid (a first since my high school bf). He's really nice and easy to talk to, and he took me to this little Mexican restaurant that had amazing food (and now that I've been to Mexico I fancy myself a bit of a Mexican food connoisseur. Anyway, ironically I have decided that since it went so well, I'm not going to say much about it here. But, I'm sure that everyone who is interested will get a chance to hear more details :)

Going to the beach tomorrow with the fam for a week - may I return tanned and in one piece.

beauteous curves

No, I'm not talking about me... I'm talking about my beautiful graphs that I am very proud of. I'm going to try and post them here, not because they will be of particular interest to you, but because they represent my first true TRIUMPH at work. :)

BREAKTHROUGH!!

So, there has been a serious positive development in my work environment this morning. The ladies who work in my department invited me for breakfast/coffee at the Grind. So we sat for 15 minutes and chatted and it was nice. And they told me to join them every morning if I wanted to. So, I'm glad, even if they are 30 years older than me. What's funny is it came out that I'm *significantly* older than what they thought. They thought I was 21. That's like the cute little girls I met while camping who thought I looked 19. They were in awe when they found out I'm actually 26. Ha.

On another note, I made a new friend at the bus stop. He's this older man, Polish, and so nice. He laughs all the time. Half of the time I can't even understand him, his accent is so thick and his English not so great. But this morning he asked if I was married. When I told him no, he was clearly shocked "What??! A beautiful girl like you?!?" (I'm paraphrasing for your convenience - his English is very broken). And when I told him "maybe" sometime in the future I would get married, he was like, "Listen, I know you don't believe me [because I was laughing him off], but to be married and have a family, that's what makes life wonderful. To be alone - not so good." It's too bad I believe him deep down. My counselor thinks I'm messed up in the head when I say "my ideal scenario" would be to be 500% content being single for the rest of my life, NOT to find the man of my dreams and settle down. I never thought of that being weird until he mentioned it. Shows you how damaging my prior relationships have been on my psyche. But just yesterday I was ranting at God for giving us stupid humans a deep-seated desire for a committed, intimate, long-term relationship. Why not make us complete on our own? Grrr.

Ok, I'm definitely babbling. And I have a thousand pretty graphs to make about age-of-onset inicidence rates for the major mental disorders :)

I'm so charming :-p

Apparently when I was at a party last week this guy (a co-worker of my good friend) was interested in me and trying to flirt with me. I had no idea - apparently he's pretty shy. He seems to be cute and nice, too bad he's into the FSM and not Jesus. BAH!

Oh well, at least I still have my irresistible charm. I guess HB may be right after all that every time I go out with her I get hit on... I just might not know it. :)

A day without pessimism... feels weird :)

I'm inexplicably perky today. And this day started off all wrong. I had really bad dreams and overslept. I got out of bed 1/2 an hour before I was supposed to be at work, and still made it there on time. Maybe it's the beautiful weather. Or having lunch with a friend. Or the farmer's market. Or getting my new book in the mail - I picked it up down the street because I accidentally shipped it to my old work - oops! Anyway, I was waiting in line to get my TB test read (good news: they finally decided that I dont have TB!) and I was having a hard time controlling my glee just from reading the table of contents. What is this book you might ask? Well, it's PURE AWESOMENESS. The Complex Infrastructure Known as the Female Mind. If anyone can guess who it's written by from the title, I'll buy them a drink. :) And as I write this, I'm just remembering I owe Ben a gold star...